A full week as a family of four. I can say nothing but it has been one of the best weeks of my life. I told Alex the other night how heartbreaking it is to me to think of someone that suffers from the baby blues or postpartum depression because i am pretty sure I have the opposite. There have been times this week i was convinced my heart would explode spewing glitter and unicorns because of my intense love for my kids and family.
I am so grateful that the transition, so far, to being a stay at home Mom to two kids (under two for the next three weeks) has been great. Honestly, it was a lot easier for me to take care of the two of them this week than just Liam when i was pregnant. Feeling back to normal has been such a huge blessing.
Miss Lucy is doing great. She is back to her birth weight and doing all of the newborn things (sleeping, eating, and pooping) like a champ. At discharge we learned that she needed to come back to the hospital for a repeat hearing test on her left ear. Her appointment was yesterday and her left ear still came back “referable”. The audiologist assured us that it very well could be debris still left in the ear canal or fluid behind the ear drum. In a few weeks we will go to the audiologist office were they have better equipment and will be able to get a better feel for what is going on. Either way i seek comfort in knowing that her right ear is perfectly fine and she will be able to hear us, music, and life.
On the day we got discharged from the hospital I came down with a pretty nasty cold. Talk about freaking out! I have been crazy about trying to keep all the germs away from Lucy but since I am her primary caretaker I am not sure how easy it can be to do. Liam woke up with a stuffy nose this morning, so i know it is coming his way and i feel like I am barely holding my stuff together knowing what the next two weeks may bring. Some of the nurses in the hospital said that babies as young as Lucy can’t get sick (i guess it is an old wives tale, one i really want to believe is true) but her pediatrician said no she can get sick. Please, please if you are the praying kind please keep Lucy in your thoughts that she does not catch this bug. Her doctor said yesterday the real trouble would come if she came down with a fever which is a one way ticket to being admitted to the hospital with a battery of VERY scary, VERY invasive tests to rule out all possible infections. She said even if they are able to see it is an ear infection or something similar they will put them through all of the testing. Needless to say since yesterday I have been a nut case.
I feel selfish in a way to say that I thought after all we had been through with her pregnancy I anticipated things to relax, that we would finally be able to enjoy everything without the worry of something being wrong. You all know from past posts that I rushed through and didn’t savor the time I was pregnant with her and now i feel like I am going to be doing the same thing for her first month of life. I love this newborn stage so much but i just want her to get to one month, fever free and then I know we are in the clear of all the testing that would be needed if she got sick. I just don’t want to be sick anymore. I just want to be able to sit and struggle with her without worry.